What The Hell Is "Psychodivergent?"

I mean, in a nutshell? It's some shit I made up. But it's also really goddam perfect isn't it? It feels like such an accurate way to describe us.

It's the name that came to me because it just made the most sense. The more I learned about my personality disorder(s) and my other mental health issues, the more frustrated I became with all the ugliness surrounding labels like: Borderline, Narcissist, Sociopath, Psychopath, the infamous Dark Triad (cue spooky music and cheesy horror screams.) All of the content and buzz and media around these words seem to be the hot topic of the moment and almost all of it made me feel like shit.

I have CPTSD, Borderline Personality Disorder and I exhibit some traits of Narcissistic Personality Disorder. The more I learned about the biological aspect of mental illness but also the ways in which the early childhood abuse that most of us suffered damaged our brains and altered our chemistry, the more compassion I was able to have for myself. These mental health issues are things we were either born with, or that were inflicted upon us, or both-either way, we had no choice in the matter. But even more than that, our behaviors aren't a result of us just not giving a shit about how we treat others. It is so hard for us to overcome out toxic traits because are brains are now damaged.

I appreciate the way the word "psychodivergent" is reminiscent of "nuerodivergent" because there is a lot of crossover between the two. Many of us have multiple diagnoses that include things like ADHD and Autism. All of these things exist upon a spectrum, mental health disorders don't always fit into tidy boxes. Through a complicated mix of biological factors, neurological factors, and adaptive behaviors, our mind (psyche) has become abnormal (divergent.) I am psychodivergent, and saying that feels validating.